The Quarterly Grain Report

Vehicular Etiquette

Scenario: You are traveling northbound on a two-lane road. A vehicle in the oncoming lane is approaching, and the driver appears to give you some sort of familiar acknowledgement, be it a wave, point, nod, etc. But the wave was issued so late that you do not have enough time to both assess who dealt it, and respond accordingly based on gender and relationship. A suitable response directed at one of your chaps might be a strong, index-finger point, whereas the same motion directed at a lady may seem too urgent and severe.

But neverthless, by now whoever saw you with ample time to issue a wave either feels a) Like you blew him off, or, more likely, b) That he is at fault because he knows (being familiar with the whole system) that his wave was, indeed, eleventh-hour.

So, still not knowing exactly who it was, you do what comes naturally, but proves to be utterly useless, and look in the rear-view mirror. While carrying this out, you realize that very little, if anything, can be determined from the sight of the back of someone's car rapidly speeding away, and you feel slightly embarrassed for looking.

This seems to be a daily, stressful occurrence for me. To rectify this, I've removed all mirrors from my vehicle. This way, when a car passes, waves, and I look for the reflection, all I'll be looking at is the tinted upper strip of windshield glass. I'll then laugh, point at the windshield, say "Touche, tinted strip of glass; you have bested me again!" and continue driving through the cemetery.

posted by Arthur Croft Yates @ 6:12 PM