A 4th Estate Oddity
First-person pet-adoption classifieds. I'm not sure that I've stumbled across anything as odd in recent months as this curious method used by the humane society to try and move its animals.
The standard approach used by most of the public still dominates the pet section (brown cat, 4 mo. old, 555-6767), but every so often a large picture of the animal will accompany the ad, and the ad itself will be styled in the form of a kind of animal personal:
Hi! I'm a very loving Persian named Nancy who loves to play and has been neutered. I would love a loving home filled with tender salmon and love. If you are interested in me, call 555-8231
Why would the humane society, or anyone for that matter, go to such great lengths to describe a stray? People who place personal ads for themselves don't even go into the detail that some of these pet ads do. With human personal ads, one's entire life and future goals can be condensed into a handful of initials: SWNSNDF skg SWNSNDBM for SM. But a cat deserves a paragraph to describe what kind of demeanor it has, or whether it looks into its owner's eyes when it's shitting? I guess so.
"Well, Honey, this one's a year old and he looks like he would fit right in. But this other cat placed his own ad! Hmm... Ya know I just don't know. From his ad he kinda sounds like a smug asshole. Everything's all about him all the time. I say we go for Henry, the tabby. I know, he didn't place his own ad, but that doesn't mean he's gonna be retarded or something, and end up shitting all over the place. He's probably just not as outgoing."
Is an animal more attractive to a prospective adopter if he or she believes that these personal descriptions are actually the animal's views of itself? The only information that is necessary for these pet adoption classifieds is as follows:
Cat: 555-5647
Cat: 555-4320
2 Cats: 555-7458
Cat: 555-0206
posted by Arthur Croft Yates @ 5:27 PM
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